Some quotes from one of my fave moms - Erma Bombeck:
*Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop offs at tedium and counter productivity.
*Kids have little computer bodies with disks that store information. They remember who had to do the dishes the last time you had spaghetti, who lost the knob off the Tv set six years ago, who got punished for teasing the dog when he wasn't teasing the dog and who had to wear girls boots the last time it snowed.
*Who, in their infinite wisdom, decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.
*Mother's words of wisdom: "Answer me! Don't talk with food in your mouth!"
*Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen? Three. It takes one to say, "What light?" and two more to say, "I didn't turn it on."
*When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it's a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway.
As I sit here in a quiet, albeit somewhat (uh, Laura, look around again! "somewhat" is an understatement!) disorderly home, I am thinking how incredibly lucky I am as a mom. I can point out the flaws in each of the three offspring of mine in two seconds flat, and tell you what they need to dop to improve their lot in life (see the last EB quote above!) But honestly, Gary and I have managed to produce three awesome kids. Yeah, I will throw Gary a bone here and give him some credit, especially for their athletic abilities. Lord knows THAT did not come from me. But, I do have to brag just a bit on the the fact that all three kids are good, kind, decent, and thoughtful human beings. They don't do drugs, get blind drunk, or have been arrested (that we know of). I wanted them to follow their hearts and not dollar signs, they are doing that. I wanted them to go out and make the world a better place each day by doing something, even if it is to just smile when you don't feel like smiling. They are doing that. I want them to look back and feel like they made a difference somehow, some way. I hope they feel that, because they have.
So - Catherine, Craig, and Chris - thanks for making me the best mom I could be. Not sure I hold the title of best mom in the world since there are myriad things I never let you do, but you survived! I love you all very much! Now I have to go find the copy of one of Erma's books I have floating around the house and visit with my old friend!
6 days ago